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April 4, 2015

another end to the same era.

About six months ago, I wrote this post about the end of the era that was me as a nanny to the two most beautiful children in the world. And because Skylar was only three weeks old at the time, most of my emotion came from the end of #maxandalessia as I knew it. And then life happened. I went off to BuzzFeed for three months as an intern and had the most valuable education and experience I could ever ask for. And then when I thought my life was over and didn't get hired, the heavens aligned, Max's mom went back to work after her maternity leave, and the nanny they had for about two weeks just wasn't working out. It seemed like a step backward, but I knew that I needed a job while I was getting back on my feet, and Max and Sky needed me. So I went.

The last three months with them back in my life have been even better than the first time around, something I never imagined could be possible. Skylar is a bit older now, recognizes me, and stops crying for me (a huge point of pride). I know her every need and want before her bottom lip has a chance to quiver, and as for Max, well, we've always been besties who get each other, so as he gets older, time with him just gets better and better.

Even when I left the first time, I had always said, "these kids will continue to be in my life no matter what", and now that I'm leaving them for a second time, I have absolutely zero doubts in my mind that they will be a constant part of my life, just in a much different way. Once again, I'm dealing with the bittersweetness of it all: that I get to move on and take a job that I have been working so hard toward getting, which means leaving them behind to be with a new nanny, who whether I like it or not, will fall just as much in love with these kids as I have.

So these little chickens still have my heart, and always will, but things are going to be different. Our time together is so much more precious, something that absolutely cannot be taken for granted, and I know that Max will slowly begin to realize that as he starts noticing the changes without me there every day. The era has come to another end, likely the most permanent end, as I can't imagine I'll ever be their full-time nanny again, but they are part of the reason I got the new job that I did, and for that reason alone, I think that things are finally working out for me and the career I set out to build myself.

Everything happens for a reason has never rang more true for me than right now.

Side note: #maxandalessia and #alessiaandskylar will never cease to exist, so keep an eye out for nugget updates.

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